Suicide is a complex problem for which there is no single cause or single reason. It results from a complex interaction of biological, psychological, social, cultural and environmental factors. Suicide has no racial or class distinctions. However, suicides can be prevented and suicide prevention is everyone’s responsibility.
On 10 September, the World Suicide Prevention Day, at 8 p.m., let us stand alongside Sumithrayo - dedicated to serving the community for the past 49 years, as we gather to illuminate the darkness with a candle, honouring the memory of those lost to suicide and offering solace to the families left behind.
On this solemn occasion, let us confront the shadows that haunt our minds, daring to breach the veil of silence that surrounds the harrowing topic of suicide.
The following programmes have been organised for the day: an awareness walk starting at 8 a.m., from 60B, Horton Place, Colombo 7; a webinar on Zoom from 6 - 7.45 p.m. and the lighting of candles at 8 p.m. at 60B, Horton Place, Colombo 7.
In our pursuit of understanding suicide, we hold the key to saving lives and helping all those who are distressed. Facing the undeniable truth, suicide is a subject that touches each of us at some point in our lives, yet, discussing it openly remains a challenge. Nevertheless, engaging in continuous dialogues about suicide, its origins, prevalence, risk factors, and delving into the experiences of those in crisis, provides us with the greatest opportunity to prevent its occurrence and address the associated concerns. While the reasons behind suicidal thoughts may vary, some comprehensible while others intricate, the emotions and struggles that individuals in crisis undergo due to depression are profoundly genuine and may appear entirely rational to them.
Born from a series of serendipitous events, Sumithrayo, with its profound origins, is a beacon of hope and compassion. The year 1953 saw the inception of the Samaritans in London, a ripple that journeyed across continents and time. A love story unfolded as Joan Hamilton travelled from London, England, to unite with the inaugural Bishop of Kurunegala, Lakdasa Jacob De Mel, in 1971. Little did they know that their journey would intertwine with the birth of Sumithrayo on a memorable 15 June, 1974. Emerging as a sister to the Samaritans, Sumithrayo humbly took root in two unassuming rooms at the Ceylon Social Service League in Maradana. But, fate had grander designs, bolstered by the generosity of Joan and Lakdasa De Mel. They gifted their Horton Place property, a gift that paved the way for the establishment of 60B, Horton Place, the nucleus of Sumithrayo. A poignant chapter was scripted when Edward Chad Varah, the visionary behind the Samaritans, journeyed from London to lay the foundation stone at this very site.
Much akin to its predecessor, - the Samaritans, Sumithrayo stands unwavering in its mission to prevent suicide and extend solace to those left shattered by its aftermath. Their outreach transcends crisis intervention, embracing those besieged by loneliness, despair, and anxiety. Within these walls, empathy flourishes, eclipsing the bounds of sympathy. Here, seekers find a haven of understanding, where non-judgmental friends provide unwavering confidentiality. The late Joan De Mel's dream realised, a realm where vital services are rendered freely. Sumithrayo's volunteers don the mantle of guardians, treating each soul in turmoil with the gravest regard. Their commitment is rooted in swift responses, empathetic listening, and impartial support. Their calling is to empower, to guide callers to forge positive life paths. No barriers, be they societal, religious, or personal, exist in this haven. Those seeking solace encounter an atmosphere of total confidentiality, where emotional scaffolding is but a call away. Befriending is the cornerstone, where callers are led to unearth their own solutions, unburdened by imposed directives. The essence lies in active listening, where the focus shifts to the person in need. This approach not only proves efficaciousness but also soothes the anguish of isolation and depression. It proclaims the validity of their emotions, delivering an assurance that time and attention are theirs to claim. Communication with a fervent listener provides a steady anchor, a conduit for emotional release, akin to catharsis. A connection, often fleeting, can irrevocably alter a life's course. Survivors of suicidal thoughts illuminate the profound impact of words and actions, sharing their journeys to the brink and moments before the precipice. Many attest to yearning for intervention, for someone to sense their desperation. Their yearning underscores the potency of simple questions. Life is fragile, a moment's outreach can divert the trajectory. Survivors often express that it was not advice that they sought, but empathy that salvaged them. In addition to befriending services, Sumithrayo also conducts awareness programmes for those in need of suicide awareness and prevention, including programmes on developing skills to deal with the everyday stresses of life.
Sumithrayo also has a specialised unit named ‘Mel Medura’ - the Sumithrayo Drug Demand Reduction Programme, which assists persons with substance dependencies (alcohol, drugs, tobacco, etc.) and behavioural dependencies (gaming, sex, smart phones, etc.). At Mel Medura, an extension of Sumithrayo established in 1985, volunteers are on the lookout for individuals at risk of drug and alcohol dependence. People from diverse backgrounds seek confidential support at this centre, with a focus on assisting those struggling with substance dependence. Alcoholism and drug dependence are complex issues, and while there is no one size fits all solution to stopping drinking or drug use, there is help available. Supporting a loved one battling alcohol or drug dependence can be incredibly tough for families. At Mel Madura, trained befrienders create a warm and welcoming environment for substance users. Their purpose is to understand the root of the addiction and guide them towards sobriety. Each user receives an individualised plan based on the underlying cause of their addiction. Befrienders educate them about addiction and provide tools to move forward in life without relying on substances. Ultimately, their main goal is to support drug users in achieving sobriety and adopting a healthier lifestyle.
Prevention of suicide
In addition, it is essential for the media to avoid sensationalising suicide reporting. Graphic details and the use of certain words like "commit" can perpetuate harmful stereotypes. Instead, promoting a public understanding of the complexity of suicide and avoiding simplistic explanations is crucial. We should refrain from labeling places as suicide "hotspots" as well. Most importantly, suicide helpline information should be provided at the end of the report to offer support to vulnerable individuals with suicidal thoughts and prevent potential tragedies.
Often, a person who is suicidal feels isolated and alone with his or her problem, which seems beyond their capacity to cope. People contemplate suicide when their pain exceeds their resources for coping with it. At times like these, talking about their stressful situation with a non-judgmental, accepting, understanding and caring person can throw a different light on the situation and help diffuse the suicidal impulse.
The vision of Sumithrayo is to strive for a society in which: fewer people die by suicide; people are able to explore their feelings without fear or prejudice; and people are able to acknowledge and respect the feelings of others.
Often, indicators of impending suicide go undetected or are not addressed as they should be. If you or one of your friends, acquaintances, or family members exhibit the following risks and warning signs, it is crucial that they be helped. The risk of suicide is greater when: there is a recent loss or breakup of a close relationship; unhappy changes in health occur or are anticipated (for example, a painful, disabling, or fatal illness); alcohol or drug abuse takes place; mental illness occurs; there is a history of suicide in the family; and there have been previous attempts made to end one’s life.
People often communicate suicidal feelings by: being withdrawn and unable to relate to others, having and/or expressing definite ideas on how to die by suicide, talking about feeling isolated and lonely, expressing feelings of failure, uselessness, a lack of hope, or lack of self esteem, and constantly dwelling on problems for which there seem to be no solutions.
You can be the light to save a life by disseminating information about our services. Sumithrayo is open and is available to provide emotional support on all 365 days of the year, between 9 a.m. and 8 p.m., face to face, on the telephone, and by electronic mail. Help is available in Sinhalese, Tamil, and English languages. Our services are strictly confidential and free of charge.
Sumithrayo can be contacted on: telephone - 0112692909/0112683555/0112696666; e-mail - sumithra@sumithrayo.org; website - www.sumithrayo.org; and address – Number 60/B, Horton Place, Colombo 7. Mel Medura can be contacted on: telephone - 0112693460/0112694665; e-mail - melmedura@sltnet.lk; website - www.melmedura.org; and address - No. 60, Horton Place, Colombo 7.
(Sri Lanka Sumithrayo is a Government approved charity founded in 1974, by late Joan De Mel and was incorporated by an Act of Parliament, No. 10 of 1986. Sri Lanka Sumithrayo is a registered member of the Befrienders Worldwide and function as a non-political and non-religious organisation focused on providing emotional support to help those at risk of suicide)
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The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author, and do not necessarily reflect those of this publication.